i think my mom watched the whole time
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Randomize
