so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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