the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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