i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
everyone is single if you try hard enough
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
