K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
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