Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
