"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Randomize
