It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize