hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
They should really pass out barf bags in church
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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