first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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