my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
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