Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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