I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize