carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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