How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize