for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize