I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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