How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Randomize
