sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
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