Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
