She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
