it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
I skipped work to stalk him.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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