yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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