i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
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