yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize