I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
