why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
