are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Randomize