so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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