what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Randomize
