What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
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The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
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What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
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