i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
