I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Randomize
