I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
We are two peas in an std pod
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
