if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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