I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
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I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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