I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Randomize
