I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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