Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
