I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
