She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Randomize
