So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
They are going to name an STD after you.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
