they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize