I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
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A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
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Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
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