pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
there is glitter all over my balls
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize