It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize