your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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