The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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