Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
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You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
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It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.