Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Dating After Heartbreak
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
These Images Prove Chrissy Teigen is the Funniest Model Alive
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.