What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
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