i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I need water and some morals
Randomize
